Question
Atualizado em
15 abr 2018
- Chinês Tradicional (Taiwan)
-
Inglês (RU)
-
Inglês (EUA)
-
Francês (França)
Pergunta encerrada
Pergunta sobre Inglês (EUA)
Silently, in the dusk
Gloominess belchs out from my tragic torso
All the black keys and white keys are in the dark
Shaking hands trample violently on the piano
Finally, ended up an B minor rhapsody composed
I, sitting there with my lunatic composition
Piano, who sets me free again
Rejoicingly, in the dawn
Euphoria permeates through my groovy gusto
All the black keys and white keys are in jubilation
Nimble fingers flying dexterously on the piano
Finally, ended up an C concerto being composed
I, sitting there with my fabulous improvisation
Piano, who spends the great time with me again
Piano, my dear familiar
You are the sunshine in my life
All the grief and happiness we have together
Write down all of our wonderful days of yore
Now, I want to tell you with my sincere heart
“You are my everything” soa natural?
Silently, in the dusk
Gloominess belchs out from my tragic torso
All the black keys and white keys are in the dark
Shaking hands trample violently on the piano
Finally, ended up an B minor rhapsody composed
I, sitting there with my lunatic composition
Piano, who sets me free again
Rejoicingly, in the dawn
Euphoria permeates through my groovy gusto
All the black keys and white keys are in jubilation
Nimble fingers flying dexterously on the piano
Finally, ended up an C concerto being composed
I, sitting there with my fabulous improvisation
Piano, who spends the great time with me again
Piano, my dear familiar
You are the sunshine in my life
All the grief and happiness we have together
Write down all of our wonderful days of yore
Now, I want to tell you with my sincere heart
“You are my everything” soa natural?
Gloominess belchs out from my tragic torso
All the black keys and white keys are in the dark
Shaking hands trample violently on the piano
Finally, ended up an B minor rhapsody composed
I, sitting there with my lunatic composition
Piano, who sets me free again
Rejoicingly, in the dawn
Euphoria permeates through my groovy gusto
All the black keys and white keys are in jubilation
Nimble fingers flying dexterously on the piano
Finally, ended up an C concerto being composed
I, sitting there with my fabulous improvisation
Piano, who spends the great time with me again
Piano, my dear familiar
You are the sunshine in my life
All the grief and happiness we have together
Write down all of our wonderful days of yore
Now, I want to tell you with my sincere heart
“You are my everything” soa natural?
Respostas
15 abr 2018
Featured answer
- Inglês (EUA)
Natural
Nice poem!!
I like your use of strong words to describe things!
There are occasionally words here and there which are a little awkward, and a few prepositions missing, but the basic meaning is still there!
Things I noticed:
Gloominess is a feeling—hard to express. And “belches” is a very unpleasant word only associated with burps and volcanoes, geysers or such.
Maybe use “Gloominess seeps from my body” or “oozes from me onto the dimly lit black and white keys. My trembling hands stumble across the piano keys”
“Finally, my B minor rhapsody is completely.”
“Groovy gusto”—don’t know that that means and is very awkward. Groovy is an old word.
The rest of it sounds really cool!
Was this answer helpful?
Read more comments
- Inglês (EUA)
Natural
Nice poem!!
I like your use of strong words to describe things!
There are occasionally words here and there which are a little awkward, and a few prepositions missing, but the basic meaning is still there!
Things I noticed:
Gloominess is a feeling—hard to express. And “belches” is a very unpleasant word only associated with burps and volcanoes, geysers or such.
Maybe use “Gloominess seeps from my body” or “oozes from me onto the dimly lit black and white keys. My trembling hands stumble across the piano keys”
“Finally, my B minor rhapsody is completely.”
“Groovy gusto”—don’t know that that means and is very awkward. Groovy is an old word.
The rest of it sounds really cool!
Was this answer helpful?
- Chinês Tradicional (Taiwan)
@Elizacello31 thank you very much ❤️
[Notícias] Ei você! Aquele que está aprendendo um idioma!
Você sabe como melhorar suas habilidades no idioma❓ Tudo o que você precisa fazer é ter sua escrita corrigida por um falante nativo!
Com a HiNative, você pode ter sua escrita corrigida por falantes nativos gratuitamente ✍️✨.
Com a HiNative, você pode ter sua escrita corrigida por falantes nativos gratuitamente ✍️✨.
Registar
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